Trial of Faith
by Kyouryoku Senshi
Summary: Missing scene from deleted scene in IWTB. What exactly did Father Joe mean when he told Scully she gave up?


Title: Trial of Faith

Author: Kyo

Rating: PG-13

Spoilers: Deleted scene from IWTB.

Summary: What exactly did Father Joe mean when he told Scully she gave up?

Scully couldn't get those words out of her head as she rushed from Christian's hospital room. "I've been here before. You, me and the boy. This all happened. You gave up. You gave up, but you can't give up." Those very words touched so deeply, it hurt.

What did he mean by that anyways? He told her before not to give up, but what did he mean that she gave up? Did he know about William? Was that what he was referring to? He did somehow know Mulder's sister was dead. Could he have been referring to her leaving Mulder to his quest alone? But he specifically said the incident with Christian happened before. What did that mean?

She enclosed herself in her office and once she realized she was alone, she allowed the tears to fall. Each and every day, she wanted so badly to have her son back. However, nearly every night she had nightmares of him being taken from her and the anguish she experienced alone when her baby was nearly killed.

She took a deep breath and opened her desk drawer to examine a picture of her precious baby with a big goofy grin on his face that reminded her so much of his father. He was always such a good baby for her and made it known how much he enjoyed her presence, especially when she sang to him. She rubbed her thumb over the photo and placed it back in her desk.

Wiping away the tears on her face, she decided she had to find out what he meant by that statement. As she exited her office, she ignored all the stares she received down the hallway from colleagues at her obvious reddened eyes.

Luckily or unluckily enough, Scully found Father Joe back in his hospital bed. He looked over at her right away as she approached with urgency. He could definitely tell she had been grieving only moments before. "What was that for?" she demanded in a low, harsh tone.

"What are you talking about?"

"I think you know what I'm talking about. Earlier. You told me I gave up…that this had happened before. What. Does. That. Mean.?"

Father Joe looked away for a moment. "Well, you had a little boy, didn't you?"

Scully could feel the tears creeping up and she did her best to hold them at bay. "How the hell did you know that?" she fought to keep an even tone

"I don't know. I can just see it, in your eyes. When you look at that boy, here, in this hospital. He reminds you of your son, doesn't he?"

Scully bit her lip and tried to remain composed, although she was fooling herself. "I'm his Doctor. His care and treatment is in my hands, it's my responsibility."

He looked at her disbelievingly. "But it's not why you're doing this, is it? You want him back, but you can't…so you're here trying to fill that emptiness."

Scully quickly brushed away a tear from her face. "Tell me; tell me why you told me I gave up, to not give up?"

"You gave up your son for adoption, because you were afraid. But what makes you so sure he's better off without you?"

At that point, Scully could have cared less about the tears coming down her face or the attention they received. "You don't know anything about me or my son!" her voice broke

"No, I'm just a messenger…but I know you gave up, were afraid and I'm telling you that you can't give up."

Scully paced around the bed, hands at her hips before she swung back around to face him. "Well, everything has already been lost. I'm not sure what else I can do."

"You can fight. You can see him again someday if you don' give up."

Scully wanted to believe the sick old man and maybe he was right. She needed to see her baby again. She gave him one last look and then knew what she had to do.

She had to find Mulder.

END

A/N: This deleted scene made me think a lot. I really think Father Joe was meaning William when he mentioned she had given up. This was my filler to her reaction to that.


End file.
